Herbal Health

Children’s sleep, or the lack of it, is a major preoccupation for many of today’s parents. “Does your child sleep through the night yet?” seems to be the first question everyone asks—if your puffy eyes do not speak for themselves. Someone else’s smug response, “My child has slept through the night ever since we brought him home from the hospital,” wakes up every hair on the back of your neck—even though they, like the rest of your body, can barely function.

It is, understandably, an issue charged with an entire range of emotions—anger, guilt, relief, and elation. All parenting issues seem intensely important, but this one seems even more so. Perhaps this is because sleep—or the need for it in both parent and child—can begin to affect one’s decision-making ability and undermine even the most confident parent. It can bring discord to ordinarily happy families and affect parents’ feelings toward their child.

But it is possible to look objectively at the problem, to define it as it appears in your family, and to determine a course of action with which you will feel comfortable. In order to devise a workable plan, you first need some solid information about young children’s sleep.

When a child’s sleep habits cause recurring or continuing problems for the child or his parents, there is a sleep problem.

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Anxiety often shows itself in difficulty in our interpersonal relations. We feel that we are no longer at ease when meeting people, strangers, and even those whom we know quite well. Oddly enough, it is usual for us to be noticeably easier in our professional and business dealings with people than we are on social occasions, even when the social occasion is quite casual and of no consequence. The reason for this is that in our professional and business dealings both we and the others have something definite to do; we have an allotted role, as it were, and we know what has to be done; but small talk and polite conversation on a casual social basis is much more difficult. Tension makes us awkward. It seems hard to establish friendly communication. We tend to become self-conscious, and aware of what we are doing and saying, whereas in a healthy state of mind our conversation happens naturally and spontaneously without any great conscious control on our part. Things seem strained. Any pause in the conversation worries us. Silence becomes unbearable, so we feel we must keep talking at all cost. Because of our inner tension we lose our easy flow of thought, relevant subjects elude us, and we become aware that pur conversation is mere chatter. We are prattling, jabbering; and we try to pull ourselves together to keep our tension from those about us. On other occasions there is a poverty of speech, and we are embarrassed because we cannot say anything. Our silence is caused by the overactivity of the inhibitory process making an attempt to damp down our reaction to our anxiety. But it goes too far, and we find ourselves so inhibited that we cannot say anything. A tenseness comes between us and our friends. They in turn come to sense that we are not fully at ease, and as a result they tend to behave towards us less freely and in a more guarded fashion. The social occasion which we used to enjoy becomes a kind of nightmare—something to be avoided at all costs.

Recently, I saw a lad whose main symptom was his difficulty with his friends. To be more accurate, I should say his difficulty was with those around him, as he was fast losing all his friends.

He is a nice lad, quite a gifted university student, and a good athlete as well. But he is incredibly tense and extremely rigid in his way of thinking, so once he gets some idea in his head, whether it be good or bad, there is no shaking him from it.

His tension and irritability were so great that I could easily see that there would be no fun for young people in the company of a lad like this. His former friends had left him for the simple reason that his tension made them feel uncomfortable.

This difficulty in interpersonal relationships resulting from anxiety may come between husband and wife so that they almost become strangers to one another; with young lovers an invisible something comes between them, cutting off the free interchange of their emotion. In a similar way the anxious mother may become separated from her baby; and try as she will, she is unable to re-establish their harmony together because the infant, in animal fashion, senses her tension and reacts to it.

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Practice makes perfect. A swimmer needs to swim regularly before he can win any competition; a cyclist has to practice regularly before he can beat others in a race. Mental exercise is no different from physical exercise. Hence you must practice this psychological switch regularly before you can achieve the ability to self-hypnotize and attain an artificial THS and subsequently sleep control. It is perfectly normal and healthy that we have occasional nights when we cannot sleep. We must not feel despair and immediately grab sleeping pills.

The following are two versions I used in the audio cassette Sleep Without Drugs. The rate of self-talk should be very slow, and the inner voice should be calm. There should be pauses between phrases, and when you talk to yourself try to feel every word you say to your body and let your mind physically travel along each part of your body. In the following, // means pause. This is the first version:

Let your eyes close, and breathe gently and slowly and regularly II with each breath you are letting yourself relax more and more II you are learning to gain more and more control on your own relaxation II with each breath you let go more and more II calming down and easing off II let go the muscles of your legs II just let them loose II let the muscles of your legs go loose and floppy II let them just lie there II let them go II let them relax II feel the natural weight of your legs weighing down on the bed II feel them heavier and heavier II do nothing to the legs II just let them stay there II heavier and heavier II let them loosen up II let this heavy relaxed feeling come through your body II relax your stomach II let it loose II feel the warm peaceful feeling coming through you II relax the chest II with each breath II you are letting go II the pressure in your chest is easing off II feel the warm and calm feeling in your chest II with each breath you will feel more and more relaxed II as you let the air out of your chest II you feel more and more deeply relaxed II let go of the shoulders II just let them loose II feel the relaxed heavy feeling coming down the arms II relax the arm muscles II let them just lie there beside the body II the arms are now becoming more and more heavy II let them relax II the arms are now so heavy II feel the natural weight of the arms becoming more and more heavily relaxed II this relaxed heavy feeling will flow through the neck II to the face II let go the muscle of the forehead II smooth out the muscles of the forehead II feel the calmness and the peaceful feeling inside II let go the muscles around the eyes II the cheek and the jaw muscles II the teeth are no longer clenched II relax the lips II let the lips part II feel the tongue II free inside II feel the calmness inside II relaxation is now more and more flowing through you II. . .

The second version is as follows:

Now let your eyes close II you will find it easier this time to relax II just let go and remember you are in full control II you can wake up anytime if there is a need II concentrate on your breathing again II as you let the air out of the chest II you will let go II let yourself relax II with each breath II you are more and more relaxed II let go II letting go II feel yourself going heavier and deeper II deeper and deeper II deeper and more deep now II pay full attention to your legs II let your legs relax II let them go II feel the warm heavy relaxed feeling of у our legs II a heavy and comfortable feeling II more and more now II let go II let this warm relaxed feeling II increasingly warmer and warmer II this relaxed warm feeling II becomes comfortable and relaxed II let this warm relaxed feeling come through your thighs to the stomach II feel this warm relaxed feeling in your stomach II feel it comfortable and relaxing II now let this come to your chest 11 feel the warm comfortable peaceful feeling in your chest II let go II with each breath you feel more and more comfortably warm and relaxed II now relax your shoulders II feel the warmth in the shoulders II let this warm feeling come down your arms II the arms are now more and more relaxed and warm II just let them go II let this calm feeling stay there II let this calm and warm relaxed feeling come right through you II let this warm comfortable relaxed feeling come to your face II your face is now nice and warm and relaxed II the face is now soft and warm II the lips are apart II the teeth no longer clenched II the tongue is free inside II you are drifting deeper and deeper into relaxation II deeper and more comfortable II deep deep relaxation is now more and more through you II. . .

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For the insomniac, if you want to fall asleep it is important for you to create an artificial THS. Hence you have to create a spotlight and focus this onto the non-threatening and non-anxious parts of your mind. The self-hypnotic technique described here is called progressive relaxation, which is a standard technique used in the induction and deepening of hypnosis. This technique has been used by many hypnotists, such as the late Ainslie Meares of Melbourne and John Hartland of England. In this section, this progressive relaxation exercise is modified for sleep facilitation and for entering the THS. This exercise involves focusing the spotlight on each part of your body in turn. Try to stay with one format of relaxation which will always work for you, rather than change the format every night. In other words practice the same program of relaxation every night. Perseverence with the same routine has a higher success rate in inducing sleep. At the same time, it is helpful if you have a clear image in your mind of how the model of sleep control in your brain operates. Once the arousal messages from the higher control diminish sufficiently, the sleep centre will take over and trigger sleep.

I am now going to explain how to perform self-hypnosis using progressive relaxation modified for sleep induction, so that you will experience the THS and fall into a natural sleep. The THS is the psychological switch that shifts you from the awake state through to the sleeping state. There are ten commandments for self-hypnosis, and they are easy to follow but must be repeated every night.

1. Talk to yourself

Talk to yourself in your mind as if you are talking to someone else, and tell this someone else to relax. There is no need to move your lips as this talk is in your mind. This self-talk is important as it actively keeps that single spotlight working on the relaxing ideas.

2. Repetitive talk

The repetition of relaxing ideas is sleep-inducing and conveys a protective effect on the mind. This is like a mother rocking her baby to sleep. The repetitive rocking movement induces confidence and regularity in the baby’s mind and hence induces a secure feeling. Any unexpected movements or actions are arousing and threatening to the mind.

3. Use pronouns of the second person

Do not say ‘am going to relax’; say ‘You
are going to relax’. By saying ‘you’, you encourage detachment from yourself and your associated anxieties and worries. Hence it is like telling someone else to relax, although this someone else is really you and your body.

4. The law of reverse intention

Avoid words and phrases like ‘sleep’, ‘insomnia’, ‘sleepy feeling’, and ‘waking up’ as these cause anxiety for those who have a sleeping problem. This is the law of reverse intention; the more you want to sleep, the more the word sleep wakes you up. This is because, for the problem sleeper, the word sleep is charged with enormous anxiety and the mention of the word has an arousal effect on the sleep centre. Use words that are relaxing, like peaceful and tranquil, slack and loose, heavy and warm, comfortable and calm, easy and nice, deep and down, good and let go, and so on.

5. Lie in bed

Do this exercise in bed at night and every night without exception. Lie on your back, with the arms beside you in a symmetrical position. Do not wriggle and turn, as movement may generate anxiety and stimulate the mind. Most other forms of meditation also require stillness in the body.

What are thoughts, and how do we control them? If we can control thought stimulation in the cerebral cortex, the sleep centre will take over. In other words, if we can control thoughts, we will shift into the THS and sleep will follow soon.

Thoughts are like a big theatre stage

Thoughts are ideas, images, and conversations that are presented to the conscious mind. There may be a lot of thinking going on in the mind, but those thoughts that are conscious to us at one single moment are very limited. For example, right now you are reading this book, and your mind is conscious only of reading this sentence. You are less conscious of the last paragraph or of the last chapter. You are even less conscious of your surroundings, such as what clothes you are wearing, and, furthermore, you are even less conscious of the activities outside your room; unless your attention is drawn to them. At one single moment the mind is only conscious of a limited amount of information.

The mind is very much like a big stage in the theatre. There may be a lot of activities on the stage. The theatre is normally dark, and you can hardly read the programme, but the stage is bright and you can see and be aware of what is on the stage. This is like the fully awake state of your mind. You are aware of most of the events on the stage and you can be very easily distracted from one part of the stage to the other.

Thought control is like activating a spotlight

In the THS, or in any hypnotic state, the stage is dim and you cannot see what is going on. Hypnosis is like using a single spotlight to focus on a small part of that big stage in the theatre. The concentration is maximized by the spotlight, so that the rest of the stage is ignored and the mind is only aware of the limited activities focused on by the spotlight. The change from the awake state to any hypnotic state is like the theatre stage beginning to dim and the spotlight beginning to form and focus on a particular part of the stage. This spotlight can focus on any part of the stage suggested by the hypnotist. Hence the focus can be on our memory bank-some of us have the ability to regress back to childhood and experience things we thought we had forgotten. This spotlight can be focused on some of the anxious moments in our lives, but can also be focused on some peaceful non-threatening parts of our lives.

Spotlight and self-hypnosis

How do we make use of this spotlight to control our thoughts? Our mind has an anxious area as well as a relaxing area. If we focus on the anxious area, we feel anxious, but if we actively focus on the relaxing area, we feel relaxed. When you feel anxious, do nothing about it, just direct the spotlight back to the relaxing area. Present repeatedly to yourself relaxing ideas, and ignore the anxious feelings. We cannot focus our single spotlight on relaxing and anxious ideas at the same time. In other words, we cannot feel relaxed and anxious at the same time. Remember, thought control is an active exercise; you have to put that spotlight repeatedly on the relaxing ideas. Do not reject anxious ideas, as the mere thought of rejection means focusing on them. Ignore them and they will disappear spontaneously.

In highway hypnosis, your focus is on the highway. Even if you take your eyes off the highway for a moment, you have to focus your attention back on the highway repeatedly. This is like darkening the theatre and the stage, so that the surrounding activities are ignored and the spotlight is focused on the highway alone.

The shift from the awake state to the THS is quite natural for many people, but not for those who suffer from chronic insomnia. During the THS, the stage is dim and the spotlight is on some non-threatening and non-anxious part of the mind. Arousal messages are no longer sent to the sleep centre. The sleep centre takes over, and we drift into sleep.

Relaxation techniques

There are many kinds of techniques that promote relaxation and stillness of the mind. In 1957 the physiologist Dr W. R. Hess, the Swiss Nobel Prize winner, demonstrated the existence of a physiological relaxation response brought about by meditation and similar techniques. This relaxation response includes slowing of respiratory rate, decrease in oxygen consumption, and reduction in heart rate and blood pressure. In certain meditation techniques, an increase in the intensity and frequency of alpha waves is also seen in EEG measurement, these waves being characteristic of the resting state in adults.

These relaxation techniques include Transcendental Meditation, yoga, Tai Chi, Jacobson’s progressive relaxation, Schultz’s autogenic training, and hypnosis. One thing common to all these techniques is that they aim to detach the subject away from his environment and to allow the mind to become still. I sometimes use the analogy of a basketball game to illustrate the beneficial effect of relaxation exercises on our busy lives. By the middle of the basketball game, the players are tired; they commit more faults, their shooting is less accurate, and they are not enjoying the game as much as before. The coach signals time out, and the players stop playing. They come away from the game and do just nothing. They are having time out. After a while, they resume the game; their accuracy improves and they enjoy playing the game again. Relaxation exercise is similar; it allows us to have time out away from the game of life. During relaxation, we completely detach ourselves from our busy lives. We learn to have time out, we learn to let our mind ‘do nothing’.

In Transcendental Meditation, a mantra is used. This is a sound, a word, or a group of words that are rhythmically repeated in the mind. This repetition of the mantra allows the mind to be insulated away from our unwanted thoughts. Both yoga and Tai Chi involve breathing techniques and an emphasis on body posture or movement. The mind is focused on breathing or body position constantly, so that the mind becomes insulated away from unwanted thoughts. Dr E. Jacobson’s progressive muscular relaxation technique involves the subject actively tensing a group of muscles and then letting that same group of muscles relaxing completely. The subject practices this tensing and relaxing progressively upon each part of his body. This is extremely useful in helping the subject appreciate what relaxation really feels like, as there is a considerable contrast between the feelings of tension and relaxation. Dr H. H. Schutz, a German physiologist, devised another method called autogenic training. This involves five exercises, each dealing with a certain feeling of some part of the body. Exercise one trains the feeling of heaviness in the limbs; exercise two the sensation of warmth in the limbs. Exercise three deals with heart regulation; exercise four concerns passive concentration on breathing; and exercise five trains the feeling of coolness in the forehead. This is practiced several times a day and can effectively elicit the relaxation response.

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To learn how to sleep, it is important to understand how sleep is controlled. Of course the brain has a lot to do with this. There are two levels of control in our sleeping activities, the higher control and the lower control.

The higher control

The cerebral cortex, the outermost layer of brain tissue, is the higher control centre. It is the thinking part, the part that determines what sort of IQ we have, what colour of emotion we experience—angry, sad, happy, jealous, frightened, etc.—and is the most influencial part of our mind. This can prevent us from falling asleep and is the major cause of insomnia.

The lower control

The sleep centre, which is at the base of the brain in the brain stem, is the lower control centre. It is the trigger to sleep. It is initially influenced by the higher control, but once sleep is triggered off the sleep centre had autonomy. The sleep centre is like other stations in the brain stem, which are responsible for the automatic everyday running of the body. One such station is the temperature centre that acts like a thermostat station, automatically regulating body temperature to around 37° C.

For the purpose of learning how to sleep, the relationship between the higher control (cerebral cortex) and the lower control (sleep centre) must be made clear. Many studies, including animal experiments, have attempted to demonstrate the existence of a sleep centre. The exact location of this is still controversial, although it is believed to be located somewhere in the brain stem.

I have selected a few animal experiments that may be helpful in establishing the model of how sleep is controlled. The following animal experiments were conducted to demonstrate that the higher control (the cerebral cortex) has an arousal effect on the lower control (the sleep centre):

(1) If the sleep centre is stimulated electrically, the animal goes into sleep.

(2) If electrical stimulation is applied to the cerebral cortex of a sleeping animal, the animal wakes up. The cerebral cortex has relayed this stimulation to the sleep centre and this has an arousal effect.

(3) If a surgical cut is made in the mid-brain separating the connection between the cerebral cortex and the sleep centre, the animal goes into chronic sleep. Even if the cerebral cortex is now stimulated electrically, the sleep centre is no longer influenced and the sleeping animal cannot be aroused.

Hence the reason why we are sometimes awake for many hours in bed is that the thinking part of the brain—the cerebral cortex— is sending arousal messages to the sleep centre. The higher control has taken over and is preventing the sleep centre from switching into sleep; this is the commonest cause of insomnia.

To facilitate sleep we have to stop the cerebral cortex from sending arousal messages to the sleep centre, so that the latter can take over and trigger sleep. Arousal messages are uncontrolled thoughts. If we can learn how to control thoughts, we can shift from the waking mode to the transitional hypnotic state (THS) and consequently into sleep:

Waking mode         →    THS     →    Sleep mode

Transitional hypnotic state—THS

Chronic insomniacs are people who cannot shift from the waking mode to the THS. The cerebral cortex of the brain is too involved with uncontrolled thoughts and this prevents entry to the THS mode; hence the sleep centre cannot trigger sleep onset.

The THS was discussed in the previous chapter, and is the transitional state between waking and sleeping. This is an observed state in anyone falling asleep. However, this state can be artificially induced in ourselves when we are ready to fall asleep.

To enter the THS we must limit and control thought stimulation in the cerebral cortex. This is like making an imaginary surgical cut between the cerebral cortex and the sleep centre. Once we are in the THS, the level of arousal in the cerebral cortex will be minimal and the sleep centre will take over and trigger off natural sleep. This imaginary surgical cut involves the technique of thought control.

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